Book Review: "The Fourth Trimester Companion: How to Take Care of your Body, Mind and Family as You Welcome Your New Baby" by Cynthia Gabriel

I enjoyed The Fourth Trimester Companion more than I was expecting to! While I was expecting this book to be a run-of-the-mill postpartum recovery book, I found that Cynthia Gabriel packed in so many actually useful tips about how to make the transition home with baby a bit smoother. Often, books focus heavily on pregnancy and preparing for birth, even though the birth is just a moment. Furthermore, books that have a focus on postpartum are frequently more about newborn care or infant feeding. Gabriel fills a gap, providing folks with real, useable suggestions and setting honest expectations.

Early in the book, when discussing the immediate postpartum, Gabriel notes that there is always time to bond with your baby, even if one does not have the opportunity right away, like during a c-section or an emergency situation for instance. Additionally, Gabriel emphasizes many times the idea that parents should not worry about creating poor/unwanted habits in their babies long term, such as with sleep or attachment. I thought these were both really important statements, giving parents permission to release those expectations! Parents are (hopefully) going to have a lifetime with their babies, and there is always time to make up for missed moments or make changes to habits down the road. Often times, I see parents lost with worry about “messing up” their child. It can be so helpful in shifting this mindset when they are given permission and know that it is “normal” to not “get it right”; there are, in fact, infinite ways to parent and each person, even within a couple, will probably parent & problem solve their own way!

As somebody who works heavily with postpartum people, I really enjoyed Gabriel’s statement about new parents “cocooning with their baby” for the first two weeks after returning from the hospital/birth location. This is a gentle phrase that I think helps set the tone and expectation when shared with friends and family. Everybody wants to come see the brand new baby, and some folks might take offense when asked or told not to come visit, but cocooning implies that you just aren’t ready yet! Some other phrasing that I enjoyed were Gabriel’s offered names for day 3-4 postpartum, when hormones dip and milk transitions. A couple suggested names were “stuff gets real day”, “leaking out of every hole in my body day”, and “mother hazing”. While somewhat making light of what is often one of the most challenging days in the immediate postpartum, these names also offer real insight into what a postpartum person might expect. I anticipate I will use one of these phrases when describing this day to future clients & students.

Although there are so many things I loved about this book, I likely would not recommend this book as a sole information source about postpartum. I felt it lacked a lot of the more basic ideas and material about postpartum recovery, newborn care, and feeding that first time parents are often looking for. There was also a lot of “breast is best” messaging and mostly heteronormative language. I do, however, think this book is a great supplemental resource. It touches on many topics that I have not seen covered in other books, such as how to utilize hospital services, actually useful tips about how to prepare and introduce your dog/pet to new baby, and how to navigate changing relationships with older children, your partner (& your sex life), and your parents/in-laws. Overall, I feel I got a lot of information out of this book, and I cannot wait to start sharing this resource.